Friday, February 26, 2010

In my humble opinion

I have read in Malaysian newspapers that 7 out of 10 inter marriages between people from western cultures i.e the orang putih failed miserably.

There were a few assumptions such as the different cultural background, the different religious background and the short time of knowing each other are being the reasons.

I am married to a white American Muslim. There were many unpleasant encounters with Malaysian especially Melayu when I went home to visit.

One incident when browsing at a craft store I was asked if I was a social escort to a white man I was with.

I was given a dirty look when my husband held my hand at a Rest and recreation stop on the north south highway. I overheard a derogatory comment "Kesian mat salleh tu dapat pompuan siam tua" . For goodness sake my husband is also old. We are in our late fifties.

I was told off at a crowded arrival gate to move to a hotel room when my husband was hugging me when he came out of the customs.

I was called names when some people on my blog found out I married a white man. I was called besar kepala, megah, lupa diri etc.

Some even assumed that I was not practicing Islam and discarded my asal usul.

These are some reasons that are hard to make an inter cultural marriages work.

In my humble opinion, in order to have your marriage work if you happen to have a white man for a husband is to live away from your community. Periodical visits are healthier in your relatioship with your family as well as with your marriage.