Losing touch with my mother tongue, am I?

To my horror I discovered that i lost touch with my mother tongue, the first few days I arrived in Malaysia. I knew what i wanted to say, but the sentences did not come out right. The simplest thing like asking a receptionist, on how much
the fare to KL from KLIA stumped me. I went like " berapa harga nak ke KL dan cara mana yg terbaik" sounded so foreign even to my very own ears. I could not compute in my head, the way people 'normally ask". I was ashamed as well as felt lost for a while. Three days in KL I could muster enough courage to go on my Penang accent. Then I felt at home.

It felt bad that i could not communicate in my colloquial language. It was not so bad to communicate with hotel receptionists or sales persons, but I was not comfortable talking to friends. I did not want them to think that I was putting on airs by refusing to speak in bahasa melayu. I tried to explain, but i do not think that they could empathize with me

I could think in my head what to say in malay and even have personal conversations in malay in my head, but it was hard to speak it out loud. I could even chat in malay most time on the internet. believe me it was different when you have not used the language verbally for quite a while.

PJs at Gurney Plaza

We decided to spend a night a beach hotel as to be able to go to the famous mile long night market in Batu Feringgi. We stayed at this little hotel that has a beach. I think it is somewhere between Tg. Tokong and Tanjung Bungah. After checking in, Debbie and I went to survey the vicinity. I remembered the area, as it was near the chinese swimming club where I used to go swimming a long time ago. It was also near Motel Sri Pantai where rumours had it, that it was a place for rich people "simpan" their mistresses.

Well, when walking to find some drinks, we were directed to the pasar malam that was just starting. We had sugar cane water freshly squeezed. We bought ketupat palas and rendang, various foods as well a kilo of the great dokong for 3 ringgit. On the way back we bought a bunch of pisang goreng and cempedak goreng.

We saw 2 singapore registerd SUVs parked at the double yellow lines and at the busy traffic light. The Pisang Goreng man was saying that these singaporean have no respect forMalaysian law. I agreed with him. These people apparently went to the pasar malam earlier and were parked there to enjoy their food. They were still parked there when I left. One guy walking across the zebra crossing with us commented that, if he had a big lorry he would certainly run over those suvs which were obstructing the traffic.

We ate or food in the hotel room and then went down to the swimming pool where my little niec and nephew had a gala time. We just walked along the beach collecting sand dollars.
At night we went to the market and of course there were all fake branded goods, like coach handbags and pirated cds and dvds. bought some, but did not browse the whole mile.

The next morning we went to the beach and the tide was coming in and of course the kids want to chase the wave and we got wet.

my jeans and debbie's jeans were wet up to our thighs and thus had to change. we had no change of clothes, so we decided to go back in our jammies. When we reached Gurney drive, my sis in law wanted to stop at Gurney Plaza. Well, Debbie and I shopped in our pajamas. Me in my pirate of the Caribbean with skulls all over my pants and Debbie in her calf length pajama pants walked in the plaza very confidently. We even ate our lunch at that restaurant that faces the sea and nobody bid an eye lid.

Berkibar bendera ku

This morning my husband helped me hoist-up the Jalur Gemilang on the bell post and the Penang flag at the gate post. In a jest he said that not to be surprised if a red neck comes and shoot the flags down. The reason being, to some, it is unthinkable for someone to fly any other flags other than the US flag. I told him I will be ready with my shotgun. After all the flags are hanging on my private property.

What a Blast

I had the most memorable visit back to Malaysia this time around. I visited my family and my friends and so much enjoyed their companies.

I met with all my closed family members and friends. There were friends that I newly acquired and there were old friends that I kept in touch and there were friends (classmates that I have not seen since 1970.)

There was a friend who was my boss. The was the mother of my friend (who considered my husband and I as keluarga angkat) who were so gracious, so hospitable that I can't find words to described. Rashidah and family and kak Munah, thank you so much.

I enjoyed my trip to taman negara with the family of fellow blogger whose friendship and generosity I can never repay or reciprocate. I hope I did not embarrass her and family by making a fool of myself gorging the fruits by the roadside. MakAndeh and family and jedi thank you.

I am so much indebted to the "KL tour guide" who made herself available all her time to make my shopping and visiting during my stay in KL. I hope she enjoyed tagging along 2 ladies who could not make their minds what to shop. Bella we appreciate your patience and time you were with us. Please thank Korbau for letting us share his precious wife with us.

There was the "judge" who arranged for a reunion of my old classmates and offering the use of her personal chauffeur to take us around.

Of Course I will never forget the generousity and the hospitality of my dearest friend who put us up at her house for the duration of our stay in KL.

My brother and sister in law and their family who put us up while in Penang. They share their children with us too. Delightable kids. Thank you all.

I will write about my adventure later. This piece is to tell all my friends and family that they made my visit so memorable.

I also want to apologise to those friends that I could not meet or make contact due to my tight schedule.

Thank you all

Roo had a turkey dinner

Usually when we leave the house we always keep the gate closed and let Roo be the Guard. Today when we returned from town, we saw Roo had had her dinner with feathers everywhere in the garage. We assumed from the feathers, it must have been a turkey. poor turkey must have got into the yard. Any critters which are not familiar to her, she would definitely does her job. This time poor unlucky turkey that wandered too close.

Visiting or going home?

It is kind of hard to admit that I have made this place my home. I have worked hard to make this niche in the woods in rural Oklahoma my own. I am already missing my husband and my home before I even make my journey back to Malaysia for a visit which was not so long ago my home too. There were strong ties and pull then when my parents were still alive to make that long journey. It was not so painful to sit for 30 odd hours on the plane and in transits. It was then worth it.

My last 2 visits were not as exciting as I anticipated. My siblings and their families were busy with their lives and hardly had time for us (my husband and me). The friends/colleagues who were "eager" to see me again after a long time did not even bother to drop by at the place I was staying (which was within their walking distance from their work place.) I was sad, but then I thought that I was not a friend enough for them to see me. I should have made plans and thought of me first rather than making meeting and be with them my priority. Lesson learned.

However there was an exception on my last trip though. My brother in law in Melaka took a few days leave just to be around and cooked me delicious meals. Those dishes we used to enjoy at my mother's. He was so thoughtful because during that time my sister as a teacher could not get away from her school activities even at weekends. (she is a primary school teacher) That thoughtful gesture is embedded in my heart forever.

This time around, I am visiting for me. To see the country i left and still very fond of. I want to enjoy the country and if anyone of those friends can fit in my schedule, i do them too. I will not be disappointed or sad if they can't come to see me.

I have very GOOD friends too who offer me a place to stay when I come and visit. I have a friend who offers a car from their showroom for me to use.
On top of it I have made many new friends on the internet whom I want to meet.

I am hoping this trip will be a memorable one, to last for a long time. I can't win all the time, but I am hoping this time around is a winner. I am not getting any younger and long distance haul does not sound attractive anymore.

It is already July huh

Tomorrow 7th Day of the 7th Month in the Year 2007 will be my 55th birthday. I am maturing to this age very gracefully. I may not be the spring chicken, but I am not much older than the woman I was a decade ago. However, I have changed a lot. I have made a 180 degrees turn in my mid forty. I have chosen to live nearer to nature and be happy with what I have. I keep to my believe that happiness is a matter of choice not a chance.

I see people whom the terms "tension and stressful" are their daily vocabulary. I can only say that I feel sorry for them. I feel life needs to be organized and have priority in the correct places. Some people can't handle even a little bit of pressure. Some people can't even make a little change. This reminded me of the time I was on duty at the punch card. I observed the same people would be late every day, not overly late but a couple of minutes or five minutes. I asked why, it was always the same, traffic jam. I just wonder, if you know that at the same time everyday, the traffic would be bad, why not leave the house 5 minutes earlier.

oh well, Now I am retired, I have no worries about getting caught in the traffic jam. I also do not need to rush anywhere. My time is mine. I drive to town when there is minimum traffic on the road. I stay home when the weather is bad. And I talked to my dogs and my plants. I race my dogs in the woods.

Oh Yes, there is plenty of peace and tranquility where I live and I thank God for this life of mine.

Of being cheap

I buy fruits when they are cheap. i eat fruits like they are my staple. I buy fresh pineapples when the price is at $1.50 a piece (regular $3.85). I buy a few of them. I buy papayas when it costs 28 cents per pound (regular at $1.28). Buy a few green ones. I buy strawberries when it is $1.50 a box (regular $2.98). Nope they are not those wilting either. they are just the overstock that walmart have.

I change my taste of fruits according to seasons. I eat plenty of mangoes (from central America) when they are 4 to a dollar. I get plenty of them because mangoes are one of my favourite. i eat plenty of seedless grapes in winter when walmart import them from Chile, those big juicy black grapes for only 98 cents a pound rather than buy California grapes for $2.98 a pound.

Now I am eating plenty of strawberries big juicy ones at $1.28 a pound. I have boxes of them in my refrigerator. I eat them with cream cheese with sugar and whipped cream or dipped in Hershey's chocolate. I top my ice cream with them as well.

This year all my fruit trees are void of fruits due to the late freeze we had in late April. The only thing I see growing in my woods are wild grapes that bounced back and a few wild plums. My "commercial table grapes" are gone. Not a single leaf left on the vines. i hope they will not die.I am not too sure with my blackberries. i saw a few buds, and that's about all. I may not have any blackberries this year.

Well, walmart have all the fruits i can eat cheap, so i do not have to pine for my home grown fruits this year.

Of little tortoises crossing the road

These few days when i drive out to town i see not less than a dozen tortoises crossing the road. I know they cross the highway to be on the other side. Most made it across, but not all do. Wonder if it is worth it. I saw little biddy ones the size of a dollar coins to those the size of big serving plates.

In my woods too, these tortoises wonder around. I even saw some mating and of course Max had to separate them. He does not pick them up any more like he used to, he just ignore them except when he sees them tortoises are "fighting".

Improvise, improvise

You want to eat curry mee instantly? you have to improvise. get a packet of curry flavoured instant noodle. boil the water, add curry powder and add all the bean curd, fish balls, shrimps (prawns) etc. add the noodles. let it boil and add coconut cream/milk.

you want instant nasi lemak? get leftover rice. add coconut milk with a sprinkle of salt. sprinkle onto the rice and microwave for 2 minutes.

Shopping

Yesterday my husband and I went to window shop for a travel trailer. It is cheaper (gas wise) to use the pickup to pull the trailer than the motor home. Anyways the motor home parked by the garage is 32 ft. long and use about 8 miles per gallon of gas, so it is not economical to drive it for camping etc. We were looking for a 24 ft or so travel trailer. There was someone wanting to sell a 24 ft trailer but in the telephone conversation, she told us it was a 32 ft. one. So my husband and I went to look at it. the very moment i saw it i knew the woman was not telling the truth. I did not like the woman nor the trailer, so when bill was talking to the woman I just said "capital N", oh well we left, and passed a car dealer and swung in. Guess what, i got a new KIA sportage. I traded in my mazda 626 and my Nissan pathfinder and cleaned out my husband's check book.

Ouch!

This is that time of the season again. The puppies have to have their shots. The regular shots and of course the rabies shot. We always give them the shots because as they are yard dogs, they might get into contact with rabid skunks or other critters. As well as a prcaution the dogs bite anyone by chance. We do not want to take the risk of them getting sick as well being safe in case they playfully bite someone.
They three have their shots yesterday and Buddy only got his rabies shot this evening. He was not ready for the shot and was uncooperative. i guess he never had them before unlike my other three puppies who are very familiar with their shots.
Today, max was limping a little bit, probably because of the rabies shot on his hind leg. he looks so pitiful and wanted some tlc. I rub his leg and he purred like a kitten and slept. I hope by tomorrow he will be more energetic. Roo and Dumdum are as energetic as ever.

Roo, Dumdum, Max and Buddy

Great disapointment

I know that the weather in Oklahoma is weird and it is getting wierder every year.
Imagine in April we still have snow and freeze. I know too that it happens from time to time but but not this late. Not when my grapes are hanging in bunches and my plum trees are loaded. My peaches and my pears are as big as marbles. I am so sad that i had to say goodbye to them. This means no pear preserves, no pickled peaches and no plum jelly.
Today my husband told me, that there is not going any more fruit trees. he does not want to see me like this.

A New addition to my family

This is Buddy. He joined us a few days ago. He is three years old and a German Shepherd. He came to be with us after his old master wanted to put him to sleep. We just could not let such a handsome puppy be put to sleep. He is a healthy puppy but a little on the lean side. He is a real people puppy and at the age of three is getting a little naughty.
The reason his old master wanted to put him away was because he loves to chase young colts and horses. He chased them all over the pasture for fun, not exactly to hurt them. Those stupid horses would then run over the fence and hurt themselves. Buddy only wanted to play. He is still missing his old home and the boys that play with him everyday. He loves to play on the trampoline, but right now he has to stay on chain less he would dash back to his old home.
Roo, Dumdum and Max are not too happy to have another puppy around. However when they were introduced to Buddy, Max is kind of respects Buddy since both of them almost of equal size and Buddy is a year older. Dumdum wanted to claim his seniority, but was told to be nice. Roo is still not very happy. She wanted to show Buddy who is the boss on this property. She still growls at him, but since Buddy is a male, they don't really fight. Buddy shows respect to her. i guess she has to be satisfied with that.
Now I have 4 dogs to walk in the morning and sure takes more than 3 hours to do it. Good for my health though.

what do you do when the weather is urrrgh

Today is such a day. It is cloudy and rainy and yukky. I have several options. I could laze in bed, I could bake, I could sit and watch the television and of course i can surf around. I did all that. i was even tempted to go talk to the bull.
I made baulu and it turned out eatable and nothing to shout about. I guess I did not do it correctly except mess my kitchen. I surfed around and found out that the person i was waiting for a phone call had already come and gone home. yes today is definitely not a marvellous day.

Steaks for Bill and Pet for me

Bill went and bought a young bull (almost 2 years old). He says it is for food. I was ok with it. We used to do that, bought a cow left it with the owner until time for the slaughter. Bill would go and supervise the slaughter and say some prayer. The only thing I ever saw was a packed beef in steaks, ground and roasts. This time it is different, he brought back the pretty bull and it is sitting in the yard. I can't bear to think of it as steaks. I can't figure how I would feel when the time comes. Right now he was bonding with Roo. they have been kissing each other this morning. I called it rubbing their noses. Kind of getting to know you.
I have told Bill I will not feed the pretty thing, will not talk to it, will not look at it. But I just went and looked at it this very morning.

ooops all terrain vehicles

My old faithful the pathfinder and the polaris.

snowed in and one wonders

When one is snowed in, one is kind of trapped. Trapped in the beauty of the landscape. Trapped in a nice cosy toasty house. Trapped in one's own mind.
My world is however wide open despite being trapped in the house. My computer is on and I am able to go anywhere i want to so does my mind. Get connected. I went blog hopping following link after link and what i discovered was that I am actually living in my own rosy little world.
My culture that I hold high, my people, and the melayu I know is not the same anymore. I went to blogs written by melayu that write in the language that I never thought that it was possible by the "polite" Melayu I used to know. the cuss, the curses, the language that i dare not use in my life are rampant. Have I lost the melayu that i love?
The melayu i find in the blogspehre are so different than the ones I knew. There are some that i feel ashame to be part of or associate with. I tried to rationalise that some people want to express themselves with words, but there are beautiful words that can send the same message, not needing to curse one's own mother for that.
I am so much sadden with this that i thought this whole thing is because i am being snowed in. However when i go to other blogs and forum and i read the comments, i feel that many that left comments (bad ones) are either losers or insane.
I went to a famous malysian singer blog and I could not believe all those curses there. They find everything to curse her. are these people real?

Max's first adventure

Max is the baby in the family. Roo mothers him, Dumdum just ignore him. He is huge but thinks he is still a baby. He whines and cry when he wants off the chain or sees Roo gets a treat. He chanllenges Dumdum to a fight whenever he sees Dumdum is on the chain. He nudges Roo to a boisterous play and of course he wuld roll on the ground in order to be on the same playing field with Roo.
However, one day last week when he was left off the chain all by himself with the gate wide open, he ventured out. He knew there was many rabbits outside in the brush in the neighbour, so without a glance back he went out hunting. At the corner of my eyes i saw a dash and whooosh, max was gone. He was gone down the hill down to the road in a flash. I saw him turned west and i got in the pickup to follow him. I stopped at the nearest neighbour's house when i heard his dogs were barking wild. Nope, no Max. I stopped and called him and whistled, no sign of Max. It was hard to see in the woods covered with ice and snow as Max is white. Then i decided to return home. I looked in the rear mirror and saw Max running by the side of the pickup, his face and under his neck covered in red.
He knew he was not supposed to go outside the gate therefore he went back to his house panting. i went out of the pickup worried seeing blood all over his mouth and neck. I checked and there was no injuries, so i guess he must have hunted and got some poor critter for lunch.
Max must have had a good hunt. within 15 minutes he had hunted down his lunch. There you go Max.